A lot of guys
want to learn how to get a girlfriend and for many the process on
how to get one eludes them. Some men come from a place of
neediness, feeling incomplete or "like a loser" (as one of my
readers once told me over the phone) if they do not have a
girlfriend. If anyone is feeling that way then I tell them they
are not ready to have a girlfriend. They first need to find out
why they have this limiting belief. In reality, people should be
content and happy by themselves and when they meet someone else,
that person only adds to level on contentment and happiness. It
is not healthy to place one's own happiness on another human
being.
So the very first step to finding a girlfriend that matches up to
you is to first work on yourself. Now what does that mean
exactly? Does that mean you should not date anyone? Well, it
depends on how much emotional stability you have. I advise men to
get their "act together" first before diving back into the dating
scene. Specifically, they should spend some time alone, like a
weekend, and take out a notebook / journal / whatever you want to
call it, and write down the things that are important to them and
write down their goals in life.
Once that is all figured out then you can write down exactly the
type of woman you will need to find to compliment those goals.
As an over-simplified example, let us say that your goal is to
travel the world for a couple of years. So you would want to
find a woman has a similar goal or you should be single while you
are traveling, this way you can hook up or have casual
relationships that suit your needs. Once you have figured out
what type of woman you want then you can begin looking for you.
Now bear in mind that the more women you date, the more you will
learn about yourself and about what you want in a woman.
I can tell you from my own life experience that what I thought I
wanted in a woman at age 18 changed a lot when I turned 21 and
changed even more when I turned 30. Why? Because of life
experience. This is why I am not a big fan of falling in love
with the first person that likes you and then getting serious
with them. I truly believe that most men should date an
assortment of women and should not get married until they reach a
certain maturity level. There is no magic age, but I generally
recommend that men not get married before age 30. Ths increases
the odds greatly that you will have a better understanding on
what kind of woman you want.
The next step is to begin expanding your social network.
Sometimes all it takes is making one or tow new male or female
friends that will introduce you to a whole world of new faces.
It's a good idea to have a life. So if you are the type of
person that works too much it is time to take a step back and
readjust your priorities. All work and no play really makes Jack
a dull and boring boy. Women like men who have other interests
and passions, so make sure you find out what yours are.
Once you begin dating, with the intent of getting a girlfriend,
make sure that you are spending your time wisely. For example, I
once dated this woman and I thought everything was going well
until about 3 months into it she demanded that we move in
together. I told her it was too soon and that I would never
think of moving in with anyone until I got to know them better.
She got angry and said that if we did not take the relationship
to the next level that she would leave. I told her "well, if you
are going to be this immature about it then it is best that you
leave."
She did not leave, but I made it a point to break it off with
her. I do not respond well to unreasonable ultimatums. So do
not waste your time with the wrong person, but all it is doing is
keeping you from finding the right girlfriend for you.
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Rod Cortez is an international dating coach who overcame his own
shyness and anxiety attacks by utilizing his own personal power
and creating methods for meeting, talking to, and dating
attractive women. His free newsletter has helped men in dozens of
countries around the world:
http://TheDatePro.com